Most of this summer I've been writing and fussing and correcting and looking for mistakes. . .
So imagine my curiosity when on a break, I saw a very pretty woman stomping down the road, carrying a huge bouquet of red roses. With a face like thunder (her face, not mine!), I watched in awe as she dumped the flowers in a tip. Ever the elegant romantic, once she was out of sight, I fished out the roses (when I knew the woman was out of sight), brought 'em home and stuck 'em in a vase. Aren't they pretty??
I reckon whatever the man had done to have his woman dump £70 worth of roses in the bin must have been pretty serious. Nonetheless, they look great on my dresser!
So, thank you Ms Perfection. I'm glad you're fussy!
In honour of being excused from the pressure of perfection on this full moon in Pisces night. . .a little Neptune in the 3rd joke. . .I suppose, given the circumstances, we could stretch it to a Venus cj Neptune in the 3rd!
An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.
The bartender asks him, "You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it; it would taste better if you bought one at a time."
The Irishman replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, the other in Australia, and I'm here in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together."
The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.
The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way: He orders three pints and drinks them in turn.
One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other regulars notice and fall silent.
When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss."
The Irishman looks confused for a moment, then a light dawns in his eye and he laughs. "Oh, no," he, says, "Everyone's fine. I'VE just quit drinking."